Nonfiction

Reviews

Annie ， 2021-06-21 00:00

This is a powerful and much needed book as part of the canon of essays that help white people like me revisit my memories of growing up and living in this world and see it all in a new light。 As a white person， I do not ever have to "code switch" or carry the weight of "being a credit for my race。" I did not have teachers who lowered expectations about my potential because of my race。 The beauty of the format of Ross' book is it allowed me to shatter the myth I had that in my elementary， middle This is a powerful and much needed book as part of the canon of essays that help white people like me revisit my memories of growing up and living in this world and see it all in a new light。 As a white person， I do not ever have to "code switch" or carry the weight of "being a credit for my race。" I did not have teachers who lowered expectations about my potential because of my race。 The beauty of the format of Ross' book is it allowed me to shatter the myth I had that in my elementary， middle and high school， the black kids in my class had equal treatment/opportunity as I did because we were all middle-class。 This myth certainly did not hold true when I got to high school。 His book revisits his socialization inside white-dominant institutions and by doing so， it flipped the lens for me on how the experience for my black classmates was vastly different than my own due to systemic racism and bias。 Ross gives a searing portrait of law school and working in not-for-profits organizations whose mission is to serve BIPOC communities but are led by white people who write a check or do the "band-aid" actions to assuage guilt。 But the work never gets to the root causes of systemic racism。 I myself work in not-for-profits and this depiction is painfully accurate。 In his final section about action - he poses a series of questions for the reader -- I highlighted these for my reference and self-reflection because they are difficult but crucially important questions we each need to face as a white person。 I highly recommend this book。。。。more

Tracy ， 2021-06-16 00:00

This book is written as a series of letters that are history， memoir and action plan。 The writing is clear， personal， and raw。 It was the generational angle that first interested me， and Ross delivers。 He is speaking to Gen-X， and the specific， unique ways racism has affected us。 He nails that。I have to mention that the focus of this book is racism。 Not any other kind of discrimination。 The author's belief is that is we take care of racism， the rest takes care of itself。 Frankly， I'm not sold on This book is written as a series of letters that are history， memoir and action plan。 The writing is clear， personal， and raw。 It was the generational angle that first interested me， and Ross delivers。 He is speaking to Gen-X， and the specific， unique ways racism has affected us。 He nails that。I have to mention that the focus of this book is racism。 Not any other kind of discrimination。 The author's belief is that is we take care of racism， the rest takes care of itself。 Frankly， I'm not sold on that。 I've also been reading about the Combahee Women's Collective and how members didn't let their focus on intersectionality and creating community for Black/Feminist/Lesbian/Socialists stop them from joining with other groups with a more narrow focus to fight for one specific thing， so I kept reading。 I think his suggestions are good ones even if they don't solve all the problems。 If nothing else， they got me thinking about how I could apply those suggestions in different ways。Ross uses the term "friend" repeatedly， and purposely。 This is tough love here， ultimately kind， honest and respectful。 He assumes the person on the receiving end is willing and able to make things better。 The key word here is "able。" He is speaking specifically speaking to friends who are white， middle-aged men in leadership positions。 If that isn't you， his suggestions for action may feel like they fall a little short。 This isn't a complaint as much as it is a warning that this book has a distinct target audience in mind， which the title makes very clear， and for good reason。 Though this is a short book， I recommend taking it slowly。 Each letter should be given time for reflection before moving on。 I listened to the audio version which was well narrated by the author。 I received an ARC from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review 。。。more

Kris - My Novelesque Life ， 2021-06-16 00:00

RATING: 4。5 STARS

Kalyn✨ ， 2021-06-10 00:00

I'm clearly not part of the demographic the author was aiming for。 However， as a young white woman， I figured I could also benefit from the perspective Dax-Devlon Ross offers here， and I was correct。Letters to My White Male Friends is， as the name suggests， a collection of letters written for white， middle-aged men， particularly those in positions of power professionally。 The author describes his upbringing after the civil rights era and offers ways for white men in power to take action。 It's we I'm clearly not part of the demographic the author was aiming for。 However， as a young white woman， I figured I could also benefit from the perspective Dax-Devlon Ross offers here， and I was correct。Letters to My White Male Friends is， as the name suggests， a collection of letters written for white， middle-aged men， particularly those in positions of power professionally。 The author describes his upbringing after the civil rights era and offers ways for white men in power to take action。 It's well-written and eye-opening; I would definitely recommend it， even if （like me） you're not the exact target audience。The only issue I have with this book is that Ross tells these white men to focus on race rather than "wider" forms of diversity in the workplace because， "if you solve for race， you solve for everything else。" I could be totally misunderstanding his point and I'll look into it further， but this seems to go against what I've heard from other Black activists regarding the intersectional nature of oppression。 What happens to those who face different or additional forms of oppression such as ableism， sexism， transphobia， etc？ If we're focusing on race alone， what incentives would these employers have to hire a Black trans woman over a cisgender and straight Black man， for example？Aside from that small thing， I think this is a super important read。 The author narrated this himself and he did a fantastic job。 I highly recommend listening！ Thank you to Macmillan Audio for allowing me to listen to this audiobook in exchange for an honest review。。。。more

Perfumist ， 2021-05-25 00:00

More low resolution propaganda for hagtivists， ideologues and race-baiters。

Lyndsay ， 2021-05-23 00:00

The book is a collection of letters， written by the author， with the intended audience of middle-aged white men。 "I write the letters herein to my white male friends because you are everyone's target but no one's focus。"While I am a white， cisgender female， I found many of the principles， insights， and facts presented to have a very important influence on my personal anti-racist work。 The letters detail aspects of our upbringing that influence our views on the world， especially race – colorblind The book is a collection of letters， written by the author， with the intended audience of middle-aged white men。 "I write the letters herein to my white male friends because you are everyone's target but no one's focus。"While I am a white， cisgender female， I found many of the principles， insights， and facts presented to have a very important influence on my personal anti-racist work。 The letters detail aspects of our upbringing that influence our views on the world， especially race – colorblind education system， systemic racism in the judicial system， and race in youth sports to name a few。 Overall， this book was profound and offers opportunity for white men （or any one in a position of privilege） to take action in their personal lives， workplace， family， or community， to continue the anti-racist work that is so desperately required。 He urges the reader to continue to stay loyal to this work， even when movements such as Black Lives Matter are less frequently in the mainstream media。 Sincere thanks to NetGalley and Macmillian Audio for an advanced audio copy of this book in exchange for an honest review。。。。more

melhara ， 2021-05-08 00:00

4。5/5 "I write the letters herein to my white male friends because you are everyone's target but no one's focus。" This book is a series of letters （or rather， personal essays） that targets a very specific demographic - middle-aged， white men with higher education， and who are part of the mid-/upper-class group of managers， directors， entrepreneurs， and CEOs。 Essentially， this is a book for the most privileged of privileged men。 I suppose the full title of this book should be "Letters to My 4。5/5 "I write the letters herein to my white male friends because you are everyone's target but no one's focus。" This book is a series of letters （or rather， personal essays） that targets a very specific demographic - middle-aged， white men with higher education， and who are part of the mid-/upper-class group of managers， directors， entrepreneurs， and CEOs。 Essentially， this is a book for the most privileged of privileged men。 I suppose the full title of this book should be "Letters to My Rich White Male CEO Friends"。These are men who are "typically coddled and appeased。" If there is an issue about race in their company， they often hire others to provide a quick seminar on the subject （and to check off a box on their to-do list）， while they sit back， distance themselves from the conversation， and consider it a job well done without having actually done anything to better themselves or their company in the long run。 This series of letters in this book is a call-to-action for these men to do better and to better their companies from the top down。 They need to open their eyes to the prevalent racism that exists within their companies and in the broader society。 This book discusses various topics related to racism。 One of the topics that I really enjoyed reading about was Dax-Devlon Ross's discussion on privilege。 Unlike other books on race that I've read， Ross recognizes his own privileges in terms of socio-economic， education， and citizenship status。 I thought he did a great job comparing white privilege with his American-privilege and how it is often very easy to forget your status and take your privileges for granted。 However， with that being said， he also emphasized that Black people are not exempt from racism no matter their social， economic or educational background。 Racism doesn't care if you're rich or educated - it works solely on the stereotypes associated with skin color。 I also enjoyed reading the author's letter regarding non-profit organizations。 While these organizations are supposed to help the poor and disadvantaged， they are not as benevolent or as equitable as we may think。 The underlying purpose of most charities is tax avoidance and wealth preservation of rich white men， and the charities themselves often perpetuate white saviorism and appropriates stereotypes。 While these organizations have helped many people， it is harmful to have them continuously run and managed by white men。 I went into this book knowing full well that I'm not the target demographic but there was still plenty that I took away from this book。 I also think this book does a good job writing for its target demographic。 Ross is a lawyer and he certainly writes like one - the book uses a lot of big words and cites quite a few legal cases。 For the most part， the letters read like a series of college essays with arguments supported by facts and by the author's personal experiences studying at elite schools and working alongside powerful white men。 I received an eARC from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review。 Quotes are subject to change prior to final publication。。。。more

Anne Earney ， 2021-05-06 00:00

Full disclosure - I received this book for free through Netgalley。 Obviously I'm not the audience named in the title， seeing as I'm female， although I am White （I feel weird whether or not I capitalize that "w。"） But in other ways， I am not the audience - I'm not in charge of anything。 I'm not a decision maker。 I'm the person at the bottom， pointing out how leadership does not reflect the base。 Every time the book took a turn toward business decisions， I was surprised。 In retrospect， I find myse Full disclosure - I received this book for free through Netgalley。 Obviously I'm not the audience named in the title， seeing as I'm female， although I am White （I feel weird whether or not I capitalize that "w。"） But in other ways， I am not the audience - I'm not in charge of anything。 I'm not a decision maker。 I'm the person at the bottom， pointing out how leadership does not reflect the base。 Every time the book took a turn toward business decisions， I was surprised。 In retrospect， I find myself wondering if this entire premise is sexist - are there so few white women in power that we can't be held accountable for racism？ Hm。 Do I feel insulted because I belong to a group without enough power to be considered a problem in this area？ But this is not about me。 And the final message， which I took as meaning it might be just about time for all these powerful white male dinosaurs to step aside and make room for a more diverse future， well， I like that。There's a lot of good information in this book。 If you are a White man in a decision making position， you may find it helpful， especially if you want to evolve， rather than step aside。。。。more

Ron Frampton ， 2021-05-04 00:00

This book is aimed at middle aged white men to see and understand racism。

Vanessa ， 2021-04-28 00:00

The letter format， instead of traditional chapters， allows you to easily stop and truly think about the situations that were discussed。 In many of the letters the author included a few questions to motivate you to think about your experiences。 More importantly how you reacted to those situations/experiences in your life。 This is an incredible book and I am very thankful to the author and Goodreads for sending me a copy。

Michael ， 2021-04-19 00:00

This is a remarkable book。 There is history in it， and politics， but he always brings us back to how that history and those politics played out in the life of one person。 Black men have been the target of so much of our politics for so long。 It’s good to be reminded that those national conversations have personal outcomes。It’s written as a series of letters to a friend， and that framework leads to a tone that we don’t get much in the debates about race。 It invites understanding and empathy。 He a This is a remarkable book。 There is history in it， and politics， but he always brings us back to how that history and those politics played out in the life of one person。 Black men have been the target of so much of our politics for so long。 It’s good to be reminded that those national conversations have personal outcomes。It’s written as a series of letters to a friend， and that framework leads to a tone that we don’t get much in the debates about race。 It invites understanding and empathy。 He assumes the reader wants to live in a free and equal society， and maybe doesn’t realize how far we are from it。 He assumes we want to get there together。 And he has suggestions for what we can do to help。I loved it， and I hope it opens a new paradigm for talking about race， one where white people are willing to open themselves up to uncomfortable conversations。 At this point racism isn’t anyone’s fault necessarily， but it’s everyone responsibility。。。。more

Leigh Ann ， 2021-04-10 00:00

I'm going to preface this with the fact that I am not the author's intended audience。 Although I'm not a man， I had gotten this book because I wanted to see what I can extrapolate to myself （as far as unlearning white supremacy and what actions I might further take）， and because I have （too） many white men in my family who refuse to confront their own participation in the system。 Overall this book is chock-full of information and calls to actions that I think would benefit those who take up thei I'm going to preface this with the fact that I am not the author's intended audience。 Although I'm not a man， I had gotten this book because I wanted to see what I can extrapolate to myself （as far as unlearning white supremacy and what actions I might further take）， and because I have （too） many white men in my family who refuse to confront their own participation in the system。 Overall this book is chock-full of information and calls to actions that I think would benefit those who take up their flags。 The only reason I am not giving it 5 stars is for one passage that really bothered me， and made me question whether the author is aware of what that passage actually suggests。 I discuss it at length below。 Overall， this mind-opening book presents a fascinating history through anecdotes and personal narrative， which I had never learned about before。 I had known the Reagan era was a huge step back （though of course as a child I was taught it was an excellent thing， the war on drugs and so forth）， but I didn't realize the impact it truly had on a finally thriving demographic。 Neither did I know the origins of the bell curve and its blatantly quack principles。 I had been vaguely aware that charities are just a form of tax evasion， but seeing it specifically rooted in culture to address symptoms of inequity and not the disease makes me all the more disappointed and wary about where and how I contribute and volunteer。The one offensive passage， and I say this after having taken some time to examine it， is Ross' demand that we focus on race， what he calls the "mother ship" of all our problems。 I am actually insulted by this。 His assertion that "everyone benefits" as far as voting rights go is not even true！ Disabled people often cannot access polling places， and voting by mail can also be difficult depending on one's residence and competency of local mail carriers。 Disabled people lose their benefits when they marry。 They are less likely to be employed， and if they are， it's perfectly legal to pay them far below the minimum wage， as Goodwill's does。 Disabled people have higher insurance rates， and medical professionals are more likely to dismiss their concerns and crises。 Disabled people have subpar education， whether it is through special education programs， mainstream schools， or segregaged institutions， because these programs and institutions are underfunded and do not address and meet disabled students' needs。 Disabled people also have less access to social events， limited by poor infrastructure and the organizers' overlooking of any potential accessibility concerns。 And while I haven't investigated it myself， I've seen advocates and activists claim that roughly half of the Black bodies police brutalize and murder are also disabled。 Disabled people of all races today are still struggling for their rights to exist and participate in society。 Or weren't you paying attention in 2017， when the Capitol police arrested and physically dragged away the disabled activists who left their mobility aids and crawled up the steps？ They were merely exercising their rights to protest legislation that would easily result in the deaths of those without access to healthcare。 Disability discrimination is an institutional problem we also need to address and rectify， not just by making more accessible spaces， but including disability as a legitimate and equal issue。 See Douglas C。 Baynton's works for a discussion on how throughout American history， both women and Black men helped foward their own rights by insisting they weren't "disabled，" without ever considering whether disabled people deserved rights as well。 To say that we should only focus on race， and that all the rest will follow， ignores both disability history and， I would argue， Kimberlé Crenshaw's concept of intersectionality。 The latter is because when we address race， we often only address the men， and women's experiences are left by the wayside。 Add to that the experiences of the disabled， and the queer。I would strongly advise the author to reevaluate this passage and what he is actually claiming， because the suggestion that racial inequality is the most important issue， and that all other marginalized people fighting for their own rights ought to change their focus and wait their turns， is highly disturbing。。。。more

Bob Lingle ， 2021-03-07 00:00

This book made me think， it made me uncomfortable， and it provided me with some beginning steps to start doing the work。

Bethsade Elfman ， 2021-01-30 00:00

This book has such an important narrative。 I， as a white person， have been trying to better understand how I've been socialized and how I can improve。 Ross's writing comes across as direct， but not necessarily accusatory。 This book has such an important narrative。 I， as a white person， have been trying to better understand how I've been socialized and how I can improve。 Ross's writing comes across as direct， but not necessarily accusatory。。。。more

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